One Got Inside…

I think I found a new addiction
This tingly feeling that has taken control of my body.
Deep pumps hit the insides of my walls.
I continuously lose my breath each time on impact.
Body stuck in this sexual trance.
Loving every moment.
Force me to take all of you & make my body scream.
Our energies evolving through intoxication.
I am spiritually above my body & he is creeping in my bones.
His spirit has control over me.
Explosive Pisces to Pisces.
He fits inside of me so nicely.
Pushing harder into me, I can only moan & take the pain of our pleasure.
Bodies shaking, shivering & temperature rising higher.
I embrace him inside the hard fucking that he is giving me.
Promised to please the temptations that Molly & Mary Jane has put upon us.
We get lifted on this natural high of a foursome with them.
Escaped to a world where there is nothing else surrounding us.
Inside ecstasy, we devour each others flesh & feed our fantasies.
Eat this dick & swallow that pussy, opposites attracted cause 69 stood together in unison.
Speaking in a language not understood by others.
We discussed our missions & took care of business.
Touching the strength of his body, I get even more horny.
Pussy throbbing, I grab into his body weight & enjoy him on top of me.
I could suffocate inside his pleasuring me.
Feelings that haven’t came up in such a long time had taken over.
I submitted to his muscle, his words, his mind, his moans, his lips & his dick.
I could birth the world through his power & We could be too much for each other BUT…
We fit well hand in hand, Mending like the pieces of a puzzle.
Multiple shots taken & delivered.
Pain that feels good & new, concentrated focus.
Meditating inside his aura & living through the beats of his heart.
Connecting as one energy.
Trapping ourselves inside each others zodiac web, but we are the same.
Fishes creating splashes that we begin to drown in.
Pheromones & adrenaline lusting for every inch of him.
When he puts his dick in my pussy, it’s like he’s entered my castle & sat himself upon my throne.
Stating his place & his position with me.



What do we believe in?

I stopped believing in soul mates
While “I pray The Lord my soul to take”
Who can let another take thy soul
If already guaranteed to a spirit whole….

Why keep being let down by men and women that we think are going to be ours for a lifetime. Regardless, we are birthed alone and we will die alone. No need to go through the pain of heartache or losing love. I’ve given too many times to the wrong “love of my life’s” and “we’re supposed to be togethers”.
It’s good to finally realize that love and longtime are not compatible to some people. Marriage is just a sign of togetherness, in which people have put more emphasis on the ring instead of the unions. I’ve bought two rings, lost two rings, had one of my own and lost parts of my spirit in each circular motion.

No matter how good you may treat someone and how deeply we give, we still end up as one person. One spirit, one heart, one soul, that belongs to no one. I can only share my spirit and self without thinking about who can mate with my soul, which can not be taken. I am content in saying those words and be confident in keeping that. I can only be really good friends with someone that I could keep around for an extended period of time.
I’m taking all types of Outkast Love and returning it all back. Someone I can share everything with and lose nothing because we both know we aren’t lives guaranteed to each other. Even cool enough to make promises to each other and keep them without feeling the pressures of breaking hearts because we are only committed as friends. Same as Not judging someone by their names, we will not judge us by a relationship title. Just ride it out and know, whatever happens, happens. Don’t sweat the bullshit or little shit around us. Just live and be free. Someone who will say “I’m just being me” at the same time I do and we’ll keep it that way. Forever. Then maybe one day we will be more, or less, but we will….. BE.



October 30,2012

I got asked today.. “What career path do you want for the rest of your life?” My answer is always that I don’t want to have to work for anyone. I want my art to be my work. Make me prosperous from my own gifts.
It makes me sad many times that a person/artist such as myself always has to struggle the most but has the most abilities to be successful. Art is more the gift that is not seen & always taken for granted. Why?

I question where I will be in the next day, next week, month & year. Wanting to Do so much & to go so many places. But wanting to get to those places without them being because of bad circumstances. I definitely don’t feel like I’m living my life, & it’s weird because everyone thinks someone so talented, is living a great life.
I don’t have much to Show for what these hands can produce. What sucks is having to depend solely on someone else to get roots to grow in my pockets. What seeds are nurturing my path for growth? I try to put faith in people who claim they’re interested in supporting my art, and always end with those letdowns.

People offer me better opportunities but I always reject the possible chance just because I think of those who hurt my pride & spirit because they wanted to help, more to benefit themselves. And I was blind to that, until I was the let down & had to find a way out, find a place to shelter my body. Of course I want the best for myself. I want a happy beginning, & peaceful ending, but at what cost? I wang to trust. Want to be able to lay down & breathe in sleep & love as I close my eyes to feeling alive with my goals & dreams intact. Even have love for someone else as I love myself.

Yes it’s hard to trust anybody & I’m not ashamed to say that that is a protective flaw that I hold in my heart. Intuitions form so vividly within my mind. I can just read negative energy even when it’s nowhere near.

Positivity reigns in my smile but I still have to keep some sort of shield to protect my sanity. I get stressed out to the point that my thought feel suicidal sometimes but my love did myself erased that disgust. Yet I still question my worth and how long will I have to endure this cycle that has been killing me slowly since 2008.
I need a break from these hard times. This is not what growth & experience is supposed to be about.
I can’t even cry about it.

The fact that I’ve grown used to this struggle is so devastating because it forces me to know that at some point, i could be back down to rock bottom. Why can’t my mind breathe & actually feel like there may be a calm ending to this madness.

When will it end? Or will it end with me? I hope I’m not first. But sometimes I feel like that’s the only nearing relief.


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