Mother Earth’s Wavelength

Mother Earth's Wavelength.

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Deities

I have loved beyond my years
But never have I loved without tears
Have celebrated life with cheers
But couldn’t stop what my heart hears

Light so pure
We have set sail on an unknown voyage
Compass guides us with no direction in mind
Crusaders of life
Following a nomadic path to wherever
The ends of the Earth may embed us
But spirits aligned
We are stars destined to our own constellations
Pisces housing eleven signs before us
We are stronger than we are
Deeper than Earths core
Farther than the last shooting star
Whole and not
Wanting bits and pieces of you
Respectful not wanting to hurt you
But I can’t seem to resist you
Could turn away from you
But Can’t escape this peace for you
I have not a heart that can’t express to you
I have met you in the blue
I have loved you, in a time,
I have loved you in a place, in a world once erased, and created again
A million times back then
We were natives expelling rituals in a language unknown
To others our connection not shown
We threw dust to fire that grew from our minds
Now I just like you, with strength intense
Immensely for many many lifetimes
Olden spirits in our fingerprints
I do extend my hand for your fingertips to bind
And I leave you with this
Yet we meet again buried at The Tree of Souls
Ashes blowing through the wind chimes
I pray to Eywa to keep your spirit whole
Connected with me
Avatar
Do you not be that far
Back to lives where I wish you up
Upon a star

~QSS

Dream of Picnics by the Sun

I woke up to you in a dream.
An open grey matter space so serene.
Cool breeze sent shivers down my spine
I couldn’t breathe and that was fine.
No thin lines to blue cloud.
Mouth closed I called your name loud
Couldn’t see you. Only felt your presence. Reached for you and fell into the deep….
Spiritual Feelings I have for you.
Good morning Good Sun. Light that you are. Guide me your way
To sun-ripened peaches and oranges in a picnic.
Where we sit and I stare at your spirit.
Yearn to taste the sweet citrus of your lips but my eyes don’t lead my hands to you.
I’m just stuck staring deep. In the difference that you are.
The peace that resides in your soul.
I am here.
Inside your elements.
The fruits of your life.
And I am awakened, with you.
Peace.

QSS

Destination Element

1/14/13 5:54am

Did I force my hug upon you
Just to smell the scent of your skin
To know what mystical exstacy your hold could embrace.
Unforgiving flow of the Piscean waters we were birthed in
Its not a mystery to me
Not you
Nor I
Natural distractions acquired to tangle the mind
So I could alone unravel your essence
One on one
Spirit by spirit
Presence
All the persons inside of us.
Unbreakable bonds of metal
The old soul inside commanded me to be here.
In these moments
Creating time
Running lengthwise miles afar
Across my mind
Don’t hide
Never from my existence
Don’t run
Nowhere can time hide you
Kiss of the Sun
Inevitable vision & warmth in light
Connections don’t lie
Reflections in mirrored waves
No illusions or magic
This is no circus
Only a Fun house
Where we read minds
Say what the other thinks
With eyes
No words spoken
Psychic
Just let it be
Don’t strip the magnet
Gravitational pull of the Moon
You feel me
I see you
Free

~QSS

Pilot Recipe

Butterscotch kisses
Peanut butter delicacies
Chocolate adventures
Into your mind frame

A created recipe for your brown sugar
Soft center
Light exterior
Pure demeanor
Feeling the whole textures of your being
Inside my hands
I begin to sprinkle your essence
In my life as sand
I dare not taste before finished products are evolved and baked
Tempting you appear to my mind
An obsession not faked
Thoroughly mixed but undone
Taste not mastered but smell is exquisite and fun.
Resisting a reactive compulsive condition to sniff
But head on your shoulder I fell within the mist
Aggressive and strong
Assets I agree do no wrong
Not trying to jump your bones but I feel your tones.
Different hues sending my spirit different cues.
aRe you the T before or after S that is silently Vying for the double yoU Winning space where eXes couldn’t tell whY there was so much Zeal inside a spirit like me.
I could embrace you
capture all of You
Run away and keep the memory of your spirit true
Come back just as Fresh in my mind
I collectively think about time
But as my tattoo quotes
“Connect spirits to a place where time is not an element.”
And in the open air there you were standing
Right where my mental plane has landing.
Your air is so commanding…

QSS.

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Reflector

October 30,2012

I got asked today.. “What career path do you want for the rest of your life?” My answer is always that I don’t want to have to work for anyone. I want my art to be my work. Make me prosperous from my own gifts.
It makes me sad many times that a person/artist such as myself always has to struggle the most but has the most abilities to be successful. Art is more the gift that is not seen & always taken for granted. Why?

I question where I will be in the next day, next week, month & year. Wanting to Do so much & to go so many places. But wanting to get to those places without them being because of bad circumstances. I definitely don’t feel like I’m living my life, & it’s weird because everyone thinks someone so talented, is living a great life.
I don’t have much to Show for what these hands can produce. What sucks is having to depend solely on someone else to get roots to grow in my pockets. What seeds are nurturing my path for growth? I try to put faith in people who claim they’re interested in supporting my art, and always end with those letdowns.

People offer me better opportunities but I always reject the possible chance just because I think of those who hurt my pride & spirit because they wanted to help, more to benefit themselves. And I was blind to that, until I was the let down & had to find a way out, find a place to shelter my body. Of course I want the best for myself. I want a happy beginning, & peaceful ending, but at what cost? I wang to trust. Want to be able to lay down & breathe in sleep & love as I close my eyes to feeling alive with my goals & dreams intact. Even have love for someone else as I love myself.

Yes it’s hard to trust anybody & I’m not ashamed to say that that is a protective flaw that I hold in my heart. Intuitions form so vividly within my mind. I can just read negative energy even when it’s nowhere near.

Positivity reigns in my smile but I still have to keep some sort of shield to protect my sanity. I get stressed out to the point that my thought feel suicidal sometimes but my love did myself erased that disgust. Yet I still question my worth and how long will I have to endure this cycle that has been killing me slowly since 2008.
I need a break from these hard times. This is not what growth & experience is supposed to be about.
I can’t even cry about it.

The fact that I’ve grown used to this struggle is so devastating because it forces me to know that at some point, i could be back down to rock bottom. Why can’t my mind breathe & actually feel like there may be a calm ending to this madness.

When will it end? Or will it end with me? I hope I’m not first. But sometimes I feel like that’s the only nearing relief.

-TJW

What is Mother’s Day?!?

Since I was 13, I wasnt really too fond of Mother’s Day. My mother passed away August 21, 2002 when i was 12 and since then, I didnt really care to celebrate for any reason.

I understand how people always say that we should still celebrate for all the other mothers in the world, but this “holiday” closely means nothing to me anymore.

I’ve become closeminded to this day, as I’ve done in the same sense that Father’s day means a bunch of donkey ass to me. I havent seen or heard from my father since I was 7 yrs old. I dont even know that bastards real name, and its sad that my family doesnt either. I only share his last name. So orphan I am. Shame right? lol, maybe, maybe not.

Today it makes me a little bit more tense as well, that my sister starts a lil mommys group “Momtourage” with all her “mother” friends and I try to close my ears to it, but I get asked to help on certain things. Which I dont want to help with because I cant be included because I dont have kids, and dont want kids anytime soon. Not jealous, but would like to not hear about it. I dont know. I guess there are a million things that I dont connect with from my sisters. Of course Im the Martian of the family so I stray away from the Kids and having a family thing. Yes Im the youngest but I have just as much stuff going on as the next person…. so should I be counted out?
I dont know… back to subject. Mothers Day can be a little painful at times just thinking and watching others embraces their mothers and kids, so I feel that I shouldnt join in those festivities of life because I am without both. Yea I have(had) a grandmother, whom I dont speak to for many unGodly reasons, and yes my sisters have kids, but I constantly am out of the loop because I dont feel those joys that my Mother could bring me. I’ve forgotten the little bit that I once felt and hate that I was so young not to have the same memories that my sisters shared with my mother.

Im not bitter, and these arent cries for help or attention, just know that, when I dont show happiness or enthusiasm around these times, its because I seriously feel that I have no reason to. I know there are plenty of people in the world that can relate to this because we all have those losses and misfortunes that change our lives forever, but we cant carry them as burdens on ourselves. Its just the feeling that we have and cant relay by showering others with gifts, flowers and cards, when we cant shower the one woman who gave us the greatest gift we have, LIFE!

I guess these are the many reasons that I have grown to be so independent, because I feel that I’ve never really have a bond, or the motherly teacher to show me how life is and teach me what I should do as I was growing on. I had to learn everything practically on my own. Good and bad, those lessons in life have built me to be the strong, independent, outspoken, forthright, strong willed, artistic woman I am today. Through everything, I am still learning, without the advice children get to call and ask their mothers about, so I call to myself forthe answers I need in life. No one can make you be who you are, but there should always be someone there guiding and helping you along the way. Where is my guiding light?!?

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